|Megan drawing on chalkboard Allen made|
Then I read this post from Grace about how her husband takes care of the children for a few hours after doing his night rotation as a Labor and Delivery resident so Grace can get some blessed sleep. There's a lot of layers of love there on both Grace and Simon's part. Grace is offering up some heroic parenting to support Simon's career and Simon is doing some heroic parenting to support Grace. It's all just impossibly sweet wrapped up in This Is Life.
|Charlie at 3 months|
|Allen, Megan, Charlie first day of school|
As our family grew, so did our skills and our relationship with each other. We were blessed with fussy, particular, high maintenance babies (who turn into relatively easy toddlers and preschoolers). It was eminently clear that if we didn't cling to each other, we would sink. So, we learned how to cling and then how to swim and by this point we are hanging out on quite the lush boat.
I figured out the key to my husband and I sort of think it's the key to all of them so I'm sharing.
Allen wants to be a knight in shinning armor.
He wants to save the day.
He wants to be the hero.
He wants to be the rock.
He wants to get the girl.
|Noah and Allen|
We talk about ways to meet both of our needs. I lose my mind around 4:30 (as do most mothers of littles). We figured out a way that he could get his work done but also get home around 4:30. When that couldn't happen, we figured out ways to budget to have a babysitter come to help out for the OMG hour. I tell him when I'm feeling down and could use some extra compliments.
This requires a certain effort on my part in terms of self awareness. For instance, what I'm reading is almost always a good barometer for where I am in my head. I read Alpha romance when I'm feeling completely overwhelmed and just want someone to swoop in and tell me what to do. I read non-fiction when I'm feeling curious and/or understimulated. I read inspirational romance when I'm feeling as if all is right with the world. I read old favorites when I'm feeling insecure.
|Becky and Allen|
And, best of all,
he gets the girl.